Australia General -
It may be impolite for an outsider to remark on Australia's history as a penal colony. The vast majority immigrants to Australia have been free immigrants.
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Compared to many people from the UK and US, Australians may be more casual in various social situations. Those who resist this attitude may be viewed as snobbish[citation needed].
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Although viewed as a homogeneous society (70% Anglo-Celtic of predominantly English/Anglo-British origin)[9], there is more acknowledgement of the country's growing ethnic/racial diversity.
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Making jokes at another's expense or "taking the piss" is common in Australian society and is often a bonding process. However, it is frowned upon and considered cowardly to make jokes in the absence of the subject. Contrary to many other countries, Australians will generally wait until the subject is present before making derogatory jokes. For example, when an Australian meets a New Zealander on holiday, they may ask if they brought velcro gloves in order to get a better grip on those Australian sheep.[10] (See point below re New Zealanders thoughts on sheep jokes)
Language -
In informal situations some language that might be considered foul or offensive in other cultures may be used to convey different things. However it is considered rude and offensive to behave in this manner in front of children and women especially in rural areas.
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"Indigenous Australian" and "Aboriginal person/Torres Strait Islander" are polite terms, also regional/state preferences such as "Koori" are also acceptable as long the person in question and you both consider each other friends. Aboriginal refers to Indigenous people from the mainland, the Torres Strait Islanders are a separate group with their own cultural traditions. "Abo", "Coon", "Gin" and "Boong" or "Boonga" are all considered offensive and unacceptable in formal conversation when describing Aborigines but are sometimes in casual conversations even when one of the participants is of Indigenous descent, though this is controversial and often frowned upon. "Aboriginal" is now used only as an adjective, although older documents may still use it as a noun (eg, "Aboriginals"). Note that the words "Coon" and "Gin" are not always considered offensive in other contexts - the former being a popular brand of cheese and the latter a common drink. The politest option is to simply avoid the issue of race.
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State/ regional preferences for specific names for groups of Indigenous Australians have also arisen in recent years: The term Koori (or Koorie) in New South Wales or Victoria. Those fromQueensland use the term Murri (pronounced the same as "Murray"). Nunga is used in most of South Australia. Noongar is used in southern Western Australia. Anangu is used in northern South Australia, and neighbouring parts of Western Australia and the Northern Territory. Palawah is used in Tasmania. However, there were over 200 different languages at the time of European settlement, which means these terms are very specific.
Ethnic issues -
Although those of Middle Eastern, Italian, Slavic or Greek descent may make flippant use of terms such as 'Leb' or wog (as in recent film "The Wog Boy"), as well on television comediesAcropolis and Kingswood Country) others should be wary of using what might still be received as a serious ethnic slur. The alternative term "New Australian" is becoming ridiculed, and never was the preferred term among ethnic groups. It may be used with permission between very good friends of differing ethnic backgrounds but is considered to be offensive term to use towards any other person or in a formal setting.
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In the UK, the term "paki" is considered racially offensive, however the word also evolved in parallel in Australia as a shortened form of "Pakistani". Usually used in a cricketing context, in Australian usage the word refers specifically and solely to people who are Pakistani and carries no derogatory intent.
Indigenous Australians -
Amongst Indigenous Australians, it can be taboo to refer to deceased Indigenous Australians by name, or through use of images.[11] Individuals with the same names are then expected to change their name, as not to use the name of the deceased.
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Within some Indigenous Australian cultures, it is considered taboo for mother-in-law and son-in-law to interact on any level, this includes being within the same building or room at any time.
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Indigenous Australian communities have varying etiquette. In general, it is not polite to ask strangers and new acquaintances personal questions and making eye contact is often rude or threatening.
New Zealand General -
When visiting someone's home for the first time, ask if you should remove your shoes.
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Queueing (getting in line) is polite in stores, post offices, banks, public transport stops and entertainment venues. It is rude to cut in ahead of others.
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In stores, bars, pubs and restaurants use 'please' and 'thank you' frequently, e.g. when asking an assistant/server a question, when placing an order (e.g. 'two glasses of beer please'), or when offering or asking for an item to the assistant/server you wish to buy (i.e. "this/these please"). When being handed change say 'thank you' and when about to leave say 'thank you'.
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Table manners are similar to the United Kingdom. Do not put your elbows on the table, do not burp, ask for shared food items to be passed to you if they are out of reach, etc.
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Do not ask others what their income is and do not talk about your own.
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It is considered rude to talk about strangers to your friend/spouse/children etc when they close by.
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Money, sex and religion are not suitable topics for conversation in public places including bars, pubs and restaurants.
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Do not ask a newly introduced person overtly personal questions or disclose too many personal facts of your own. New Zealanders are reserved, modest people and prefer to learn about others over time.
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Do not say or imply that the way your country does something is better than the way New Zealanders do it, especially if you only visiting. If you are pressed to comment on an issue be sure to make clear at the outset you understand you are "just a guest/visitor and this is only my humble opinion." New Zealanders would not openly criticise your country on your home soil unless invited to and in return do not expect you to criticise theirs on their home soil.
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Do not criticise someone's home.
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The majority of New Zealanders are an easy-going, relaxed people and do not appreciate aggressive, pushy, loud, impolite or arrogant people.
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Relax, be polite, be modest, speak softly and you will get along fine.
Language -
Be polite. Use 'please' and 'thank you' frequently.
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You may hear people swearing in public but most New Zealanders think this is offensive and think less of the people doing it. Swear privately or with friends but not in public places.
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Keep your voice down. Talking loudly so everyone can hear your conversation is bad manners.
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Sheep related humour is likely to bring derision from the majority of New Zealanders, who see this stereotype at once clichéd and offensive, and it should thus be avoided. Although in relaxed social situations a certain amount of banter will be engaged in, it is advisable to wait until you know people well, as in any culture, before engaging in such humour.
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The term "dairy" refers to a convenience store, not a cow farm.
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It is rude to try to get someone's attention by saying "Oi!" or whistling, especially in bars/pubs and restaurants.
Māori -
Correct pronunciation of Māori words and placenames, and the word "Māori" itself, is often important to Māori, although usually less so to non-Māori.
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It is incorrect to pluralise "Māori" and loan words from Māori by adding an "s". Māori indicates plurality on particles (te/nga/ngati) appearing before the word rather word ending.
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Sitting on or resting one's backside against a table or desk can offend Māori. A table is where food is served and should not be touched by the "unclean" regions. Similarly, you should not sit on a pillow, the head is tapu (sacred), and pillows are for resting heads only.
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Shoes should always be removed before entering the wharenui (meeting house) on a marae. Never eat inside a meeting house — the building is regarded as tapu (sacred).
Driving -
New Zealanders, in common with most other Commonwealth nations, drive on the left side of the road. As many of New Zealand's roads, including state highways outside of metropolitan areas, can be winding and narrow (often both), it is polite when a vehicle (i.e. a truck and trailer, a caravan, or a generally slower vehicle) pulls left to allow you to pass to offer two brief toots of your vehicle's horn (roughly the length of the words 'thank' and 'you'). Be cautious of using your horn within metropolitan areas (even as a warning device) as many drivers take exception to this as offensive and disrespectful and can result in road rage. Also, use discretion in taking up a passing opportunity offered in this way as road width and traffic volumes can be unpredictable.
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The car horn is not used very often, only in emergency, or when extremely aggravated, or in Auckland.
Tipping -
Tipping is seen as a foreign custom and sometimes as patronising; service is included in what you pay for. It remains fairly rare even in the main centres and should never be considered compulsory. Some cafés have "tip jars" for loose change at the counter, but putting coins in the jar is the exception rather than the rule. It has long been customary to tell taxi drivers or food delivery people to "keep the change", but taxi drivers are equally likely to round a fare down.
With the exception of cafes, bars, restaurants, taxi drivers and food delivery, people tipping is virtually nonexistent. If staff request a tip, it is considered grounds for complaint by the customer.
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