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The Stupid 365 Project, Day 41: Crunched November 11th, 2010



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The Stupid 365 Project, Day 41: Crunched

November 11th, 2010



There’s no such thing as too many cooks when it comes to finding mistakes in a book.

When a book is conventionally published, it’s put through a series of indispensable checks.

First, the editor responsible for shepherding the book through the publication process takes as long as she needs to worry the manuscript to pieces and put it back together again. While the editor’s main responsibilities are the integrity, quality, and consistency of the story and characters, she also looks for blebs and glitches, ranging from the old This chronology is hopelessly confused to Were you thinking in English? to Who the hell is Edith? to It would be nice not to totally embargo the comma from this manuscript to This is the fourth time in this chapter that you’ve used the word “tenebrous” and everything in between. And she also catches typos, misspellings, bad grammar, and whatever else snags her censorious eye.

The writer, his (in my case, anyway) face burning with shame and occasional homicidal resentment, makes the changes he can live with, in the course of which he notices 8213 other small mistakes, often of the subject-not-agreeing-with-verb variety or the ever popular I-know-I-meant-something-here-but-don’t-know-what-it was category. When he is finished, the book is presumably stronger and more readable.

At that point, the copy editor goes to work on it. And she finds thousands of things. I have the best copy editor in the world, Maureen Sugden. I know she’s the best copy editor in the world because every single writer who’s ever worked with her says so, and because she’s the seventh I’ve worked with and she’s a different species entirely from the other six, who contented themselves with snickering openly as they pointed out that Dumpster is a brand name and therefore requires the capital D or that the correct spelling of “lasagna” is “lasagne,” complete with italics, since it’s (mirabile dictu!) in Italian. (I kept changing it back to “lasagna” and the proofs came back “lasagne” until I wrote in the margin, “This is bologne,” and then they backed off.)

But Maureen — Maureen tells me when, in the fourth novel, I’ve mistakenly changed the number on Rose’s badge I cited in the first novel. Maureen tells me when I have Poke give Rose an engagement ring with his, her, and Miaow’s birthstones in it, that I got Rose’s stone wrong because he gives it to her on her birthday and there are monsoons in the book, and there are no monsoons in the month for which that stone (a ruby) stands. Maureen is She Who Is All-Wise, and also funny as hell. So the copy editor, as long as it’s Maureen, exerts a purifying influence, burning away mistakes of all kinds.

And then the proofreader comes aboard and, you know, proof-reads (I don’t mean that to sound dismissive), and after the proof-reader is done, the people in production, in the act of setting the type and laying out the book, raise questions of their own, which my editor sends back to me. I’ve yet to put out a book through HarperCollins when the production people didn’t save my butt.

But when you publish an e-book, those people aren’t there. It’s mostly down to me and my estimable e-book producer, Kimberly Hitchens, and we’re not anywhere near enough. So on CRASHED, the first Junior Bender book — coming to soon to Amazon and all other purveyors of superior pixel-lit — I asked about half a dozen people to read it and got valuable responses from all of them.

The enormously sharp-eyed Everett Kaser, known to all of you for his contagious fascination with italics and boldface type in responses, spotted perhaps 150 typographical errors and raised some good questions. (Everett has tuned up all my e-books so far.) CJ West, a terrific writer (The End of Marking Time), got back to me with clutches of correx and more intelligent questions. (I don”t mean that CJ’s questions were more intelligent than Everett’s, just that they were additional intelligent questions.) And Gary Archer, Everett’s collaborator in the inconceivably lengthy exchange of responses on how to integrate (yaawwwwwwnnn) modest (Zzzzz) html markups into responses identified another few dozen mistakes and — did I already say mirabile dictu!? — spotted a plot hole one could have flown a 747 through. Thanks to all of you.

And there will still be mistakes. In a book published by a major company I once wrote an auto chase in which the cars kept taking the first right for God only knows how many pages until they’d chased each other from Beverly Hills to downtown LA, and it went into print that way. I got at least twenty letters pointing out that they’d been going in a circle. Let’s hope we’ve done better in crunching CRASHED.




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26 Responses to “The Stupid 365 Project, Day 41: Crunched”


  1. EverettK Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 9:09 am

[EDITOR's NOTE]: This section is overly verbose and doesn’t move the story forward. It could be replaced by a simple, “A half-dozen of you, together, make up a passable editing team that doesn’t cost an arm and a leg.” Get’s the job done and saves electrons.

Also, you misspelled yaawwwwwwnnn. There should only be one ‘n.’



  1. Beth Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 9:14 am

Tim, I know nothing about the mechanics of putting a story together so that it is ready for publication.

What I do know, having read your books, is you get the one thing that really matters correct to the nth degree. You write fantastic stories.

I read somewhere that the best way to edit something is to read it backwards so that the story doesn’t bury critical thinking. I get so buried in the story I might not recognize that Poke and Rose have moved to Idaho without telling anyone.


  1. Suzanna Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 9:35 am

Good! Closer to getting my hands on another great read.

I had no idea that the editing process involved so many different levels of editing.

Thanks to your trusted circle for getting CRASHED ready for its debut!


  1. Timothy Hallinan Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 9:40 am

Everett, I tried to pass this by you, but you were tied up in your nightly HTML markup Skype conference call and couldn’t be disturbed. And when I yawn at you, it’s got lots and lots of “n”s in it. But thanks anyway for all your help — you’ve been enormously generous with time and expertise.

Thank you, Beth. See what a difference a sympathetic personality makes? All right, class, let’s compare Beth’s comment with Everett’s, and let’s have three ways in which they’re different. Do I see any hands? Yes, Jenny? That’s right, Jenny, Beth’s comment is nice and Everett’s isn’t. Very good, Jenny. Other suggestions?

I really do appreciate that, Beth. And you’ll know when they move to Idaho because they’ll be eating potatoes and wearing plaid shirts.


  1. Larissa Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 10:02 am

lol. There is something about not being able to catch your own mistakes…I have this problem. My brain knows what I think I meant but the rest of the world never will because every time I’ve proofread something my brain fills in the gaps…the value of an editor is really priceless. Well, I’m sure Crashed will be brilliant…and as well polished as 6 people can make something. (c: I look forward to it.

  1. Lil Gluckstern Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 10:46 am

There are people who are good with the “bits,” as I call them, and people who are good with ideas. Thank goodness for all of them. I didn’t realize how many people it took to make a story coherent and plausible. My respect for the creation of a good book grows as I learn more. And still there are mistakes which really bother me when I love the author.-You can have as many “n”s as you want,Tim, it’s your blog.

  1. CJ West Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 10:55 am

Too funny Everett. We are a passable editing team that doesn’t cost an arm and a leg.

This is a great read Tim and I was delighted to be one of the first to see it. I know how difficult it is to work without a net and you did a fantastic job with Crashed.

CJ


  1. Gary Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 11:36 am

Everett, now he wants us to be nice to him! Does he want his damn mistakes fixed or not?

Seriously, I felt it an honor to be asked to look at CRASHED, as if my opinion mattered or something. Anything I did represented about 0.001% of the effort Tim put into the book.

And it’s a great book. Thanks, Tim.


  1. fairyhedgehog Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 11:52 am

“the ever popular I-know-I-meant-something-here-but-don’t-know-what-it was category”

It’s funny how familiar that is!

Some of those edits are amazing but I mustn’t think about editing now because I’m busy writing my nanomuddle.


  1. Laren Bright Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 1:43 pm

Fortunately, I nevr need a proofraeder.

(But the person who writes the reCAPTCHA story sure does.)



  1. Bonnie Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 1:47 pm

It sounds like you are really lucky with your team. I’m continually astounded at the number of typos and mistakes in J.D. Robb’s books, and she makes literally millions for her publisher.

I’m always happy to throw a jaundiced eye over your stuff, too, by the way. It’s my day job, though in a less entertaining context. Though I agree with Larissa about how hard it is to find your own mistakes. When I was a secretary I used to spellcheck and proofread a letter 3 times, only to overlook a blatant typo in the address.



  1. EverettK Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 2:15 pm

Gary: I’ve heard that when people get older, they get crotchety and grumpy. Don’t let Tim’s touchiness get you down.

CJ: I’m happy to be together with you on the Old Fart’s editing team. Couldn’t ask for better company!

Tim: Skype? I still have two land-lines and hate carrying a cell phone around (and don’t, most of the time). I’m an old fart, too. Skype. Huh. But crusty as you are, I’m happy to be able to help in any small way. Us old farts have to stick together, like…uh…ummm…shit on a shingle…or…uh…no, wait…that’s not right.


  1. Timothy Hallinan Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 2:24 pm

Hey, Suzanna — If CRASHED is a great read, these guys get a fat chunk of the credit. I can’t believe I thought the manuscript was clean. My standards are obviously precariously low. But the good news is that they all liked the book. (Yaaayyy, Junior — strong debut!!)

Exactly right, Riss — when you go over something you wrote yourself (unless it was a loooonnnnnngggg time ago) you gloss it to mean what you wanted it to mean, which often results in your skipping over not only typos but also stretches of text that simply aren’t clear, dialog that’s obtuse — you know. We all forget that the reader only knows what we put on the page and it DOESN’T MATTER how profound the underlying material is, if it’s not right out there, it’s not anywhere. That’s why Gary spotted the plot hole about the diamonds, which I’ll explain some day after the whole world has read CRASHED and paid me $2.99 for the privilege.

Dead right, Lil — I’ve NEVER put a book into the editing process that didn’t come out improved, even the one time my editor and I disagreed about everything. and having people like Maureen and Gary, CJ, and even Everett available just makes it that much less likely that readers will be pulled out of the story by some stupid mistake or some impenetrable paragraph or the sudden appearance of a character named Edith. (Back in the old days, which I will blog about eventually, I frequently inadvertently changed characters’ names partway through a manuscript.)

CJ — I NEVER called you guys “passable.” Or if I did, I meant to write “unsurpassable” and accidentally blocked and cut the first two syllables. If I’d only had you to proof the blog, this would never have happened.

FHH, I have that reaction all the time. “Is this a joke? What does ‘it’ refer to? Why is this in here?” And I don’t even drink any more. All the best with NaNoWriMo — I think it’s a terrific exercise, that snotty woman at SALON notwithstanding.


  1. Timothy Hallinan Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 3:31 pm

Gary — You were invaluable, even if you are friends with Everett. Seriously the plot problem you pointed out was a mother, and the fix actually made the whole second chapter twice as suspenseful (and also more fun). Any time you want to read LITTLE ELVISES, just give me a toot.

Laren, dead right. The CAPTCHA story represented the nadir of quality control on this site. I wouldn’t say that except that I know Everett has stopped dropping by.

Oh, Hi, Everett. Um . . . how long have you been there? Well, how nice. Uhhh. Wait, are you referring to moi as an Old Fart? Ohhhh pleeeeeeeeeeeease. I’m younger at heart right now than you were on the day you were weaned, I mean, if you were — no, let’s not go there. You know you’re always welcome here, Everett. Just clear your throat next time.

Bonnie, I’d be happy to include you in the Ring of Fire, especially since I sense that Everett is about to drop out. And I know about typos. Back in an earlier life, I commissioned the design and printing of a HUGE classroom poster about Dickens’ GREAT EXPECTATIONS, and proofed every one of its 150 or so words literally forward and backward. And when the 150,000 copies arrived, I took a look and saw, in type ten inches high, GREAT EXPECTATATIONS. Fortunately my client on the project, a VP at AT&T, who were sponsoring the show, had a sense of humor.



  1. Hitch Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 3:45 pm

So, HalliMan:

HOW many books is it we’ve done together? HOW many times have you seen my name spelt? ’tis “Hitchens,” old sport, like “kitchens” with an aitch, not Hitchins, like, “I’m itchin’ to kick her butt!”

Ye gods, I feel positively diminished. I’m going to go sulk for a while now. Oh! The Humanity! In a column about typos, no less. It makes me wonder if the error was nefariously intentional. – H.


  1. EverettK Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 3:58 pm

I’m going to shut up now (for fear that the copy of “Little Elvises” that I get for ‘editing’ will have been run through a text-munger first).

No, wait, erase that. No sense planting ideas…

But, speaking seriously (yes, I do, at least once a month whether I feel it’s appropriate or not), I absolutely agree with you when you said, “Junior — strong debut!!” Without a doubt!


  1. EverettK Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 4:05 pm

Damn. Forgot something else I was GOING to say until, of course, two seconds after clicking on “Submit Comment.” Always the way it is. Sigh.

You said: after the whole world has read CRASHED and paid me $2.99 for the privilege.

Really? I understand, and fully agree with, pricing the older books at $2.99, but a brand-smacking-new book? Personally, I would expect $4.99 or $5.99 as the price for the first 6-9 months, then lowered when initial sales started to flag. But then, I’m not a marketing guru (else why would I still be pumping away at the ol’ grindstone?). I know pricing is ALWAYS a delicate issue, trying to figure out the best marketing strategy to maximize revenue over the lifetime of the product, and I’m far (FAR) from an expert. So take all of this for what you paid for it…

But I’d really expect to pay more for a brand new book than for a 15-year old one. Just my half-cents (adjusted for inflation) worth.



  1. CJ West Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 5:13 pm

Tim, the passable editing team comment was from Everett, not from you. We are all glad to contribute (in a very small way).

I’m laboring through a published book and wishing I was reading one of yours.

CJ


  1. Gary Says:
    November 11th, 2010 at 5:21 pm

Well, we all look forward to reading CRISHED, after Kimberly Hitchins has finished producing it for you.

Don’t take it too hard, Kimberly. Tim once called me Fred. And in mixed company.



  1. Timothy Hallinan Says:
    November 12th, 2010 at 1:55 pm

Hi, Hitch –

Glad to see that your mood’s improved. Whadya mean, your name’s misspelled? H-i-t-c-h-e-n-s, right? Checks out for me. People, can you believe I work with someone this touchy?

Thanks, Everett, I appreciate the (rare) kind words. LITTLE ELVISES won’t go up until February or even March — CRASHED is November, I’m skipping December and possibly January, and then it’s Simeon #5, INCINERATOR, and after that, LITTLE ELVISES. And I have to do an editing pass before I send it to anyone, so it’ll probably be a little while. But anyone who wants to read it with an eye to improving it is certainly free to do so. All offers of help are eagerly accepted.

Everett (again) — I don’t know about the whole pricing thing; business has never been my strong suit. My $2.99 books are selling pretty well, and Simeon is a known quantity, at least to some people. Junior is completely new. I’m not sure an increase in price might not discourage some people from trying a new series.

CJ — I always do that (confuse the comments) because I answer them in batches — for example, I credited Bonnie with the link to the Awful Anka Clip when it was actually Fred, I mean, Gary, who actually suggested it. But I think THE PASSABLES is a great title for a modest super-hero film, where the super-powers are things like really superior vacuuming and absolutely perfect address memorization. God, the ideas I just throw away.

Fred, I never called you Gary, did I? If so, I apologize. And when were you ever in mixed company?



  1. EverettK Says:
    November 12th, 2010 at 3:58 pm

I wasn’t trying to twist your arm to charge more for CRASHED, just giving you feedback that I was surprised. I’ve wrestled with the whole pricing issue many times over the years (with my games) and have probably lost as many times as I’ve won, so I’m certainly not a person to listen too on that subject.

I’ll be happy to read through and give you feedback on any of your projects at any time, not just “final proofreading.” I know that you don’t need people mucking around in your head until you have a pretty firm foundation “on paper,” but anytime you need a sounding board…



  1. Timothy Hallinan Says:
    November 12th, 2010 at 5:20 pm

Hi, Everett — I’m completely clueless. If Hitchens were still speaking to me, I’d ask her, but this is pretty much a new field, and the Simeons have been selling surprisingly well, so I’m inclined to hold the price. But I’m sending the question to a couple of people with a LOT more expertise than I have.

I appreciate the offer, but the way I write often means that I wind up throwing away almost half of every book, and I think I need to let my process work its way through the material before I burden anyone else with it. In fact, I want you to read LITTLE ELVISES, but not until I’ve given it an editing pass.



  1. Paul D. Brazill Says:
    November 15th, 2010 at 3:16 am

Great post, and a bit scary!

  1. Timothy Hallinan Says:
    November 15th, 2010 at 9:25 am

Scary? Me? It’s the people who respond who are scary.

Welcome, and I hope you come back. It’s too bad this is at the tag end of the comments because I’d like to plug your site. To anyone who comes back to this post, Paul has a GREAT site on reading and writing, with an emphasis on hard-boiled and stories, at http://pdbrazill.blogspot.com

Paul — will do this again later.


  1. Paul D. Brazill Says:
    November 16th, 2010 at 6:22 am

Thanks for the hat tip, Tim.

It’s the process that scares a newby like me! Just finishing a pice of writing is hard enough!



  1. Timothy Hallinan Says:
    November 16th, 2010 at 9:06 am

Ahhh, Paul, I doubt it. You’re pretty damn proficient. I’ll call attention to your site earlier on in a response chain sometime soon.


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