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LYRICS TO COLLECTION 5 KIDS' SONGS

TRACK
SONG
BY

POINT OR THEME



HEADS, SHOULDERS…




BODY PARTS



GIVE ME A LONG 'A'!! (VOWEL CHEER)




VOWELS



ABC SONG









APPLES AND BANANAS

RAFFI

LONG VOWEL SOUNDS



FOUR HUGS A DAY

RAFFI

NUMBERS



MONKEYS JUMPING ON THE BED




NUMBERS ***



I WANT TO BE A DOG

CHARLOTTE DIAMOND

ANIMALS ***



GRAMPA'S FARM

RAFFI

FARM ANIMALS, *** ADJECTIVES



SPIDER ON THE FLOOR




BODY PARTS, *** PREPOSITIONS

  1. =

THE CAT CAME BACK

FRED PENNER

PAST VERBS



A, YOU'RE ADORABLE




ALPHABET POEMS ***



THE ANTS GO MARCHING




NUMBERS ANIMALS ***



BEAR HUG









I WANT A PURPLE KITTY

CHARLOTTE DIAMOND

ADJECTIVE +NOUN

***




BROWN GIRL IN THE RING

BONEY M

CIRCLE DANCING ***

  1. =

BANANA PHONE

RAFFI




  1. =

POPCORN

RAFFI

FOOD



SANDWICHES ARE BEAUTIFUL




FOOD



PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY




FOOD



THE MARVELOUS TOY




Past verbs, noises: Draw it!



I WON'T GROW UP

DISNEY

WON'T + V

  1. =

SHARING

RAFFI




  1. =

BOOM BOOM; AIN'T IT GOOD

RAFFI

***



SHAKE MY SILLIES OUT

RAFFI

***



DOWN BY THE BAY

RAFFI

***

  1. =

THE ARGUMENT

MONTY PYTHON

NEGATIVE FORMS



THE UNIVERSE SONG

MONTY PYTHON

LARGE NUMBERS, PHYSICS, ASTRONOMY

  1. =

BRUSH YOUR TEETH

RAFFI

DAILY ACTIVITIES ***

  1. =

HOKEY POKEY




BODY PARTS AND MOVEMENTS ***



SILENT E

TOM LEHRER

SILENT E RULE

  1. =

I KNOW AN OLD LADY

Burl Ives






MY MENORA

SHLOCK ROCK

FUN WITH HEBRISH

** THESE SONGS CAN EASILY BE ADAPTED TO OTHER TOPICS


SONG # 1 Head , Shoulders


Additional Lyrics By: Nancy and John Cassidy
Head and shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes,
Head and shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes,
And eyes and ears and mouth and nose,
Head and shoulders, knees and toes, knees and toes.

Ankles, elbows, feet and seat, feet and seat,


Ankles, elbows, feet and seat, feet and seat,
And hair and hips and chin and cheeks,
Ankles, elbows, feet and seat, feet and seat.

Neck, tonsils heart and lung….

Eyebrows, nostrils, throat and tongue….

SONG # 5 Four Hugs A Day

© Earl Robinson & Charlotte Diamond

Chorus

Four Hugs a Day, that’s the minimum

Four Hugs a Day, not the maximum

 

Step one, look them right in the eye



Step two, nose to nose

Step three, reach your arms

Step four, you can’t do any harm

With...


 

Chorus

 

Don’t forget your Mama and Papa



Your Grandma and Grandpa

And all your friends, too

Brothers and sisters, aunts and uncles

And don’t forget your teachers too!

We need 1, 2, 3 and 4

We need 1, 2, 3 and 4

We need...

 

Chorus

 

Don’t forget you’ve got to give Four Hugs a Day.


http://www.charlottediamond.com/music/actions_for_four_hugs_a_day.htm


# 8 Grandpa's Farm
Traditional Lyrics

   Listen to this song.

.

Chorus:
We're on our way


We're on our way
We're on our way to Grandpa's farm.

We're on our way


We're on our way
We're on our way to Grandpa's farm.

Down on Grandpa's farm there is a big brown cow


Down on Grandpa's farm there is a big brown cow

Chorus


The cow, it goes a lot like this... (moo)
The cow, it goes a lot like this... (moo)

Chorus


The chicken, it goes a lot like this... (cluck, cluck)
The chicken, it goes a lot like this... (cluck, cluck)

Chorus


The horse, it goes a lot like this... (neigh, neigh)
The horse, it goes a lot like this... (neigh, neigh)

Chorus


The banjo, it goes a lot like this...
The banjo, it goes a lot like this...

      


 



# 9 There's A Spider On The Floor

(tune: If You're Happy And You Know It)

 

There's a spider on the floor, on the floor



There's a spider on the floor, on the floor

Who could ask for any more, than a spider on the floor,

There's a spider on the floor, on the floor

 

(Modulate up a semitone each verse)



 

(2) Now the spider's on my leg (2x)

Oh, he is such a plague, this spider on my leg!

 

(3) Now the spider's on my stomach! (2x)



Oh, he's just a dumb old lummock, this spider on my stomach!

 

(4) Now the Spider's on my neck! (2x)



Oh, I'm going to be a wreck, I've got a spider on my neck!

 

(5) Now the spider's on my face! (2x)



Oh, what a big disgrace, I've got a spider on my face!

 

(6) Now the spider's on my head! (2x)



Oh, I wish that I were dead.  I've got a spider on my head!

 

SPOKEN: "But he jumped off....



 

(Repeat 1st verse in original key)




There's a spider on the floor, on the floor

The Cat Came Back (Version 1) Written By: Harry S. Miller


Old Mister Johnson had troubles of his own
He had a yellow cat which wouldn't leave its home;
He tried and he tried to give the cat away,
He gave it to a man goin' far, far away.

But the cat came back the very next day,


The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

The man around the corner swore he'd kill the cat on sight,


He loaded up his shotgun with nails and dynamite;
He waited and he waited for the cat to come around,
Ninety seven pieces of the man is all they found.

But the cat came back…


He gave it to a little boy with a dollar note,


Told him for to take it up the river in a boat;
They tied a rope around its neck, it must have weighed a pound
Now they drag the river for a little boy that's drowned.

But the cat came back…

He gave it to a man going up in a balloon,
He told him for to take it to the man in the moon;
The balloon came down about ninety miles away,
Where he is now, well I dare not say.

The cat came back


He gave it to a man going way out West,
Told him for to take it to the one he loved the best;
First the train hit the curve, then it jumped the rail,
Not a soul was left behind to tell the gruesome tale.

But the cat came back


The cat it had some company one night out in the yard,
Someone threw a boot-jack, and they threw it mighty hard;
It caught the cat behind the ear, she thought it rather slight,
When along came a brick-bat and knocked the cat out of sight

But the cat came back the very next day,


The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

Away across the ocean they did send the cat at last,


Vessel only out a day and making water fast;
People all began to pray, the boat began to toss,
A great big gust of wind came by and every soul was lost.

But the cat came back the very next day,


The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

On a telegraph wire, sparrows sitting in a bunch,


The cat was feeling hungry, thought she'd like 'em for a lunch;
Climbing softly up the pole, and when she reached the top,
Put her foot upon the electric wire, which tied her in a knot.

But the cat came back the very next day,


The cat came back, we thought he was a goner
But the cat came back; it just couldn't stay away.
Away, away, yea, yea, yea

The cat was a possessor of a family of its own,


With seven little kittens till there came a cyclone;
Blew the houses all apart and tossed the cat around,
The air was full of kittens, and not a one was ever found.

But the cat came back the very next day,

The atom bomb fell just the other day,
The H-Bomb fell in the very same way;
Russia went, England went, and then the U.S.A.
The human race was finished without a chance to pray.

But the cat came back the very next day,


The cat came back, we thought he was a goner

(See also: Versions 2, 3, and 4)




#11 A, You're Adorable
(The Alphabet Love Song)



(Thanks to Michael Sirotta for the midi!)


When Johnny Jones was serenading Mary,
He sure could quote a lot of poetry
But he'd much rather tell her
what he learned in his speller
When they both attended PS thirty-three....

(chorus)


"A," you're adorable, "B," you're so beautiful,
"C," you're a cutie full of charms.
"D," you're a darling and "E," you're exciting
And "F," you're a feather in my arms.
"G," you look good to me, "H," you're so heavenly,
"I," you're the one I idolize.
"J," we're like Jack and Jill, "K," you're so kissable,
"L," is the lovelight in your eyes.

"M," "N," "O," "P," I could go on all day.


"Q," "R," "S," "T," alphabetically speaking, you're OK.

U," made my life complete, "V," means you're very sweet,


Double-"U" "X" "Y" "Zee."
It's fun to wander through the alphabet with you
To tell you what you mean to me. 
(repeat the chorus)

#12 The Ants Go Marching



The ants go marching one by one, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching one by one, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching one by one,
The little one stops to suck his thumb
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The ants go marching two by two, hurrah, hurrah


The ants go marching two by two, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching two by two,
The little one stops to tie his shoe
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The ants go marching three by three, hurrah, hurrah


The ants go marching three by three, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching three by three,
The little one stops to climb a tree
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The ants go marching four by four, hurrah, hurrah


The ants go marching four by four, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching four by four,
The little one stops to shut the door
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The ants go marching five by five, hurrah, hurrah


The ants go marching five by five, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching five by five,
The little one stops to take a dive
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The ants go marching six by six, hurrah, hurrah


The ants go marching six by six, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching six by six,
The little one stops to pick up sticks
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The ants go marching seven by seven, hurrah, hurrah


The ants go marching seven by seven, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching seven by seven,
The little one stops to pray to heaven
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The ants go marching eight by eight, hurrah, hurrah


The ants go marching eight by eight, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching eight by eight,
The little one stops to shut the gate
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The ants go marching nine by nine, hurrah, hurrah


The ants go marching nine by nine, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching nine by nine,
The little one stops to check the time
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

The ants go marching ten by ten, hurrah, hurrah


The ants go marching ten by ten, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching ten by ten,
The little one stops to say "THE END"
And they all go marching down to the ground
To get out of the rain, BOOM! BOOM! BOOM!

# 14 Brown girl in the ring Tra la la la la
There’s a brown girl in the ring Tra la la la Brown girl in the ring Tra la la la la
She looks like a sugar in a plum Plum plum

Show me your motion Come on show me your motion


Show me your motion She looks like a sugar in a plum
Plum plum

All had water run dry Got nowhere to wash my cloths


All had water run dry Got nowhere to wash my cloths

I remember one saturday night


We had fried fish and johnny-cakes
I remember one saturday night
We had fried fish and johnny-cakes

All had water run dry


Got nowhere to wash my cloths
All had water run dry
Got nowhere to wash my cloths

I remember one saturday night


We had fried fish and johnny-cakes
I remember one saturday night
We had fried fish and johnny-cakes

Beng-a-deng


Beng-a-deng


#15 BANANA PHONE by RAFFI


Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring Banana phone


Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring Banana phone

I've got this feeling so appealing


for us to get together and sing - SING!

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring Banana phone


Ding dong ding dong ding dong ding Donana phone

It grows in bunches


I've got my hunches
Its the best
beats the rest cellular modular interactivodular

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring Banana phone


Ping pong ping pong ping pong ping Ponana phone

Its no baloney It aint a phony My cellular Bananular phone

Don't need quarters don't need dimes
to call a friend of mine
dont need computer or tv to have a real good time
I'll call for pizza I'll call my cat I'll call the whitehouse, have a chat
I'll place a call around the world
Operator get me beijing jing jing jing

Ring ring ring ring ring ring ring Banana phone


Ying yang ying yang ying yang ying Yanana phone
It's a real live mama and papa phone
a brother and sister and a dogaphone
a grandpa phone and a grandma phone too - oh yeah

my cellular bananular phone

Banana phone ring... ring... ring... Its a phone with appeal (a peel)
Banana phone ring... ring... ring...
Now you can have your phone and eat it too
Banana phone ring... ring... ring...
This song drives me .... bananas
Banana phone ring... ring... ring...
Bo ba do ba do do doob

#16 The Popcorn Chant


http://hurl.content.loudeye.com/scripts/hurl.exe?clipid=005159901140006900&cid=010026 .

Raffi performs this chant on The Corner Grocery Store and Other Singable Songs.

 

You put the oil in the pot and you let it get hot



You put the popcorn in and you start to grin.

Sizzle sizzle sizzle sizzle...

POP!!!

#18 Sandwiches



CHORUS:
Sandwiches are beautiful, sandwiches are fine.
I like sandwiches, I eat them all the time;
I eat them for my supper and I eat them for my lunch;
If I had a hundred sandwiches, I'd eat them all at once.

I'm a roaming and a rambling and a wandering all along,


And if you care to listen, I will sing a happy song.
I will not ask a favor and I will not ask a fee,
But if you have a sandwich, won't you give a bite to me?

(CHORUS)


Once I went to England, I visited the Oueen,
I swear she was the grandest lady that I've ever seen,
I told her she was beautiful and could not ask for more,
She handed me a sandwich
      and she threw me Out the door.

(CHORUS)


A sandwich may be egg or cheese
      or even peanut butter,
But they all taste so good to me, it doesn't even matter;
Jam or ham or cucumber, any kind will do.
I like sandwiches, how about you?

(CHORUS)



#19 Peanut Butter and Jelly


First you take the peanuts And you crunch 'em,


You crunch 'em
First you take the peanuts And you crunch 'em,
You crunch 'em

For your peanut, peanut butter And jelly


Peanut, peanut butter And jelly

Then you take the grapes And you squish 'em,


You squish 'em x 2

For your peanut, peanut butter


And jelly x2
Then you take the bread And you spread it,
You spread it x2

For your peanut, peanut butter


And jelly x2

Then you take your sandwich


And you eat it, You eat it x2

'Cause its good, peanut butter


And jelly x2
First you take the peanuts
And you crunch 'em,
Then you take the grapes
And you squish 'em,
Then you take the bread
And you spread it,
Then you take your sandwich
And you eat it 'Cause its good, peanut butter And jelly

#20 THE MARVELOUS TOY

When I was just a wee little lad,
Full of health and joy,
My father homeward came one night
And gave to me a toy.
A wonder to behold it was With many colors bright
And the moment I laid eyes on it,

It became my heart’s delight.

Refrain:
It went zip when it moved and pop when it stopped,
Whirrr when it stood still
I never knew just what it was and I guess I never will.

The first time that I picked it up I had a big surprise


Cause right on the bottom were two big buttons
That looked like big green eyes
I first pushed one and then the other,
Then I twisted it’s lid
And when I set it down again, here is what it did:

(refrain)


It first marched left, and then marched right
And then marched under a chair
And when I looked where it had gone
It wasn’t even there
I started to cry, but my daddy laughed
’cause he knew that I would find,
When I turned around my marvelous toy
Would be chugging from behind.
(refrain)
The years have gone by too quickly it seems,
I have my own little boy
And yesterday I gave to him
My marvelous little toy:
His eyes nearly popped right out of his head
And he gave a squeal of glee!
Neither one of us knows just what it is
But he loves it just like me!

#21 Song: I WON'T GROW UP

PETER PAN: Are you ready for today's lesson?

ALL: Yes, Peter!

PETER PAN: Listen to your teacher. Repeat after me:
I won't grow up, (I won't grow up)
I don't want to go to school. (I don't want to go to school)
Just to learn to be a parrot, (Just to learn to be a parrot)
And recite a silly rule. (And recite a silly rule)
If growing up means
It would be beneath my dignity to climb a tree,
I'll never grow up, never grow up, never grow up
Not me! Not I, Not me! Not me!

I won't grow up, (I won't grow up)
I don't want to wear a tie. (I don't want to wear a tie)
And a serious expression (And a serious expression)
In the middle of July. (In the middle of July)
And if it means I must prepare
To shoulder burdens with a worried air,

I'll never grow up, never grow up, never grow up


Not me, Not I, Not me! So there!
Never gonna be a man, I won't!
Like to see somebody try And make me.
Anyone who wants to try And make me turn into a man,
Catch me if you can.
I won't grow up Not a penny will I pinch.
I will never grow a mustache, Or a fraction of an inch.
'Cause growing up is awfuller
Than all the awful things that ever were.
I'll never grow up, never grow up, never grow up,
No sir, Not I, Not me, So there!

I won't grow up! (I won't grow up) I will never even try


(I will never even try)
I will do what Peter tells me (I will do what Peter tells me)
And I'll never ask him why (And I'll never ask him why)

We won't grow up! (We won't grow up)


We will never grow a day (We will never grow a day)
And if someone tries to make it (And if someone tries to make it)
We will simply run away
(We will simply run away)

I won't grow up! (I won't grow up)


No, I promise that I won't (No, I promise that I won't)
I will stay a boy forever (I will stay a boy forever)
And be banished if I don't! (And be banished if I don't)

And Never Land will always be The home of beauty and joy


And neverty
I'll never grow up, never grow up, never grow up Not me!
Not me! Not me! Not me! No sir! Not me!

## 23 BOOM, BOOM, AIN'T IT GREAT      TO BE CRAZY


A horse and a flea and three blind mice
Sat on a curbstone shooting dice
The horse he slipped and fell on the flea
"Whoops," said the flea, "There's a horse on me!"

Boom, boom, ain't it great to be crazy?


Boom, boom, ain't it great to be crazy?
Giddy and foolish the whole day through
Boom, boom, ain't it great to be crazy?

Way down South where bananas grow


A flea stepped on an elephant's toe
The elephant cried, with tears in his eyes
"Why don't you pick on someone your own size?"
Boom, boom,. . .
Way up North where there's ice and snow
There lived a penguin and his name was Joe
He got so tired of black and white
He wore pink slacks to the dance last night!
Boom, boom, . .

Eli, Eli had some socks


A dollar a pair and a =nickel a box
The more you wear 'em the better they get
And you put 'em in the water and they don't get wet!
Boom, boom

Called myself on the telephone


Just to hear that golden tone
Asked myself out for a date
Said be ready 'bout half-past eight!
Boom, boom, Took myself to the picture show
Sat myself on the very last row
Wrapped my arms around my waist
Got so fresh I slapped my face!

Boom, boom


# 24


Raffi - Shake My Sillies Out

Artists > Raffi > Shake My Sillies Out
Submitted by AndyLovesChrissy on February 9, 2005

I've gotta shake, shake, shake my sillies out,
Shake, shake, shake my sillies out,
Shake, shake, shake my sillies out,
And wiggle my waggles away!

I've gotta clap, clap, clap my crazies out,


Clap, clap, clap my crazies out,
Clap, clap, clap my crazies out,
And wiggle my waggles away!

I've gotta jump, jump, jump my jiggles out,


Jump, jump, jump my jiggles out,
Jump, jump, jump my jiggles out,
And wiggle my waggles away!

I've gotta yawn, yawn, yawn my sleepies out,


Yawn, yawn, yawn my sleepies out,
Yawn, yawn, yawn my sleepies out,
And wiggle my waggles away!

I've gotta shake, shake, shake my sillies out,


Shake, shake, shake my sillies out,
Shake, shake, shake my sillies out,
And wiggle my waggles away,
And wiggle my waggles away!



# 25 Down By the Bay


Down by the bay Where the watermelons grow


Back to my home I dare not go
For if I do My mother will say
"Did you ever see a bear
Combing his hair
Down by the bay?"

Down by the bay Where the watermelons grow


Back to my home I dare not go
For if I do
My mother will say
"Did you ever see a bee
With a sunburned knee
Down by the bay?"

Down by the bay Where the watermelons grow


Back to my home I dare not go
For if I do My mother will say
"Did you ever see a moose
Kissing a goose
Down by the bay?"

Down by the bay


Where the watermelons grow
Back to my home
I dare not go
For if I do
My mother will say
"Did you ever see a whale
With a polka dot tail
Down by the bay?"

# 26 The Argument Clinic


A reception desk in a sort of office building.

Receptionist: Yes, sir?

Man: I'd like to have an argument please.

Receptionist: Certainly, sir, have you been here before...?

Man: No, this is my first time.

Receptionist: I see. Do you want to have the full argument, or were you thinking of taking a course?

Man: Well, what would be the cost?

Receptionist: Yes, it's one pound for a five-minute argument, but only eight pounds for a course of ten.

Man: Well, I think it's probably best of I start with the one and see how it goes from there. OK?

Receptionist: Fine. I'll see who's free at the moment... Mr. Du-Bakey's free, but he's a little bit concilliatory... Yes, try Mr. Barnard -- Room 12.

Man: Thank you.

[...] The man knocks on the door.

Argument Person:(from within) Come in.

The man enters the room. Argument Person is sitting at a desk.

Man: Is this the right room for an argument?

Argument Person: I've told you once.

Man: No you haven't.

Argument Person: Yes I have.

Man: When?

Argument Person: Just now!

Man: No you didn't.

Argument Person: Yes I did!

Man: Didn't.

Argument Person: Did.

Man: Didn't.

Argument Person: I'm telling you I did!

Man: You did not!

Argument Person: I'm sorry, is this a five minute argument, or the full half-hour?

Man: Oh, just a five minute one.

Argument Person: Fine. (makes a note of it; the man sits down) Thank you. Anyway I did.

Man: You most certainly did not.

Argument Person: Now, let's get one thing quite clear... I most definitely told you!

Man: You did not.

Argument Person: Yes I did.

Man: You did not.

Argument Person: Yes I did.

Man: Didn't.

Argument Person: Yes I did.

Man: Didn't.

Argument Person: Yes I did!!

Man: Look this isn't an argument.

Argument Person: Yes it is.

Man: No it isn't, it's just contradiction.

Argument Person: No it isn't.

Man: Yes it is.

Argument Person: It is not.

Man: It is. You just contradicted me.

Argument Person: No I didn't.

Man: Ooh, you did!

Argument Person: No, no, no, no, no.

Man: You did, just then.

Argument Person: No, nonsense!

Man: Oh, look this is futile.

Argument Person: No it isn't.

Man: I came here for a good argument.

Argument Person: No you didn't, you came here for an argument.

Man: Well, an argument's not the same as contradiction.

Argument Person: It can be.

Man: No it can't. An argument is a connected series of statements intended to establish a definite proposition.

Argument Person: No it isn't.

Man: Yes it is. It isn't just contradiction.

Argument Person: Look, if I argue with you, I must take up a contrary position.

Man: But it isn't just saying "No it isn't".

Argument Person: Yes it is.

Man: No it isn't, an argument is an intellectual process... contradiction is just the automatic gainsaying of anything the other person says.

Argument Person: No it isn't.

Man: Yes it is.

Argument Person: Not at all.

Man: Now look!

Argument Person:(pressing the bell on his desk) Thank you, good morning.

Man: What?

Argument Person: That's it. Good morning.

Man: But I was just getting interested.

Argument Person: Sorry the five minutes is up.

Man: That was never five minutes just now!

Argument Person: I'm afraid it was.

Man: No it wasn't.

Argument Person: I'm sorry, I'm not allowed to argue any more.

Man: What!?

Argument Person: If you want me to go on arguing, you'll have to pay for another five minutes.

Man: But that was never five minutes just now... oh come on! (Vibrating looks round as though man was not there) This is ridiculous.

Argument Person: I'm very sorry, but I told you I'm not allowed to argue unless you've paid.

Man: Oh. All right. (pays) There you are.

Argument Person: Thank you.

Man: Well?

Argument Person: Well what?

Man: That was never five minutes just now.

Argument Person: I told you I'm not allowed to argue unless you've paid.

Man: I've just paid.

Argument Person: No you didn't.

Man: I did! I did! I did!

Argument Person: No you didn't.

Man: Look I don't want to argue about that.

Argument Person: Well I'm very sorry but you didn't pay.

Man: Aha! Well if I didn't pay, why are you arguing... got you!

Argument Person: No you haven't.

Man: Yes I have... if you're arguing I must have paid.

Argument Person: Not necessarily. I could be arguing in my spare time.

Man: I've had enough of this.

Argument Person: No you haven't.

# 27 The Universe Song [From "Monty Python's Flying Circus]

*Intro*

(Spoken... music creeps in towards the end...)



Whenever life gets you down, Mrs. Brown

And things seem sad or tough

And people are useless, or obnoxious, or daft,

And you feel that you've had quite enough... (G)


(played in a simple bass-note/chord form in 4)

Just remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving

revolving at nine-hundred miles an hour

and orbiting at nineteen miles a second, so it's reckoned,

a sun that is the source of all our power.

Now the sun and you and me, and all the stars that we can see

Are moving a million miles a day

In an outer spiral arm at forty thousand miles an hour

of the galaxy we call the Milky Way.
(chords same for all verses)
Our galaxy itself contains a hundred million stars,

it's a hundred thousand light-years side to side,

it bulges in the middle, sixty thousand light-years thick,

but out by us it's just three thousand light-years wide.

We're thiry thousand light-years from galactic central point

We go 'round every two hundred million years,

and our galaxy itself is one of millions of billions in this

Amazing and Expanding Universe!


The universe itself keeps on expanding and expanding

in all of the directions it can whiz,

as fast as it can go, the speed of light, y'know,

twelve million miles a minute, and that's the fastest speed there is,

So remember when you're feeling very small and insecure

How amazingly unlikely is your birth,

And pray that there's intelligent life somewhere up in space,

'Cause there's bugger-all down here on Earth.

#28 ראש הטופס

# 32 

My Menorah Shlock Rock



 

My My My My Menorah


Hanerot Halallu Anu Madlikin. Al Hanisim v'al haniflaot v'al Hatshuot V'al Hamilchamot. Sheasita lavoteinu bayamim hahaim Bazman Hazeh. Al Yeday Kohanecha Hakidoshim. My Menorah(4x)
V'chol shemonat y'may chanukah. Hanerot Halallu Kodesh Haim.
V'ain Lanu Reshut lihishtamesh bahem, Ela lirotam bilvad K'day lehodot u'lihallel lishimcha hagasol, Al Nisecha V'al Niflotecha V'al Yeshuotecha.
My Menorah (4x)
Maoz Tzur Yeshuati, licha naeh lishabeach, Tikon bait tefiloti v'shom todah Nizabeach. L'ate tachin matbeach Mitzor Hamnabeach Az egmor b'shir mizmor Chanukat Hamizbeach.



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