**** Chapter Forty Seven: LITTLE DEWDROP

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Chapter Forty Seven: LITTLE DEWDROP

The last time Daddy had sung this lullaby to me was on my tenth birthday. I was too old to whine for it but I had. I’d heard him and Nancy earlier that evening making plans for their dinner-and-a-movie date and I just wanted to ruin it for them. I didn’t want Daddy to spend time with that witch and so I had whined – like a brat. And he had indulged me. Just like he always did.

I had barely closed my eyes to the sweet symphony of Daddy’s voice when I’d smelled Nancy’s vile perfume polluting the pure air of my room. She was whispering in Daddy’s ear, which made him instantly get up and leave. He’d even forgotten to kiss me goodnight.

I had opened my eyes as they quietly shut the door after them. And then I’d cried and vowed never to let him sing that song to me again. He had broken my heart. He had showed me his new wife was more important while I was just a whiny brat.

That last part about new wife and whiny brat didn’t plague my mind for long. As I grew older, I realized that Daddy did love me more than anything in his world. And although he never sang me the song, nor did I ask him to, he never put me up to compete with anything or anyone for his attention. I always came first except when it was something he decreed.

Then, I had to obey.

If I resisted, it was a very affectionate but firm response from him, “Sweetheart, you know how happy this will make me. And I am so proud of you. You always do the right thing.”

How does one refute such trust? My guess: one does not.

I stood in the midst of a wide, white tent in that strange city of Gustak in some parallel universe where a musician played the notes of a long lost song on his violin that my father had once sung to me in another world –

Jay wasn’t singing. The crowd was. Little boys and girls cradled safely in the arms of their parents were humming and singing along with the adults. Some sang in English; others sang in Akina. Their faces were serene, their voices clear. The looked so happy, so complete.

I stared at them. From one face to another until they all merged into an endless watery blur.

It is that time, my little dewdrop…slide over stars and swing from moonbeams; my heart twisted into a knot as Daddy’s voice from years past came floating back to me through crevices of memory. He was singing. I was six years old again and resting my head on his vast chest. And when you are older…far from my shoulder…take me with you in your eyes…

“Princess?” A tiny voice drilled through my fragile reverie. I looked down to see a small girl tugging at my skirt. “Princess,” she said.

I tried to focus on her as my mind kept blotting her face out. She lifted a tiny finger and gestured for me to bend down to her. I obeyed. The little girl gripped the hem of my chunri and pulled me further down till I was kneeling in front of her on the ground. Then, she touched my face – and wiped something wet off my cheeks.

“Why are you crying?” She was innocence personified.

I heaved a deep sigh, simply shook my head and cast my eyes down. I sensed the little girl move as a pair of black long boots took her place. I abruptly looked up and saw him.

Demon!

My heart leapt at the sight of him but I didn’t have the energy to stand up. Where have you been? I wanted to ask but couldn’t.

He looked solemn. His eyes were fixed on my face and they were quiet. “Come on,” he said softly as he offered me his hand.

I grabbed him like a drowning person grabs a floating plank. He led me out of the tent without another word and I followed him. The music didn’t stop and neither did anyone try to stop us though many heads turned and saw us exit the pavilion.

Once free from noise, people and lights in the tranquil outside, he let go of me. I walked a few yards and then sat down against the roots of a giant tree. The soft grass tickled my limbs as the soothing night air massaged my senses. I closed my eyes, rested my head against the generous trunk of an old tree and breathed.

Demon didn’t speak. But I could smell his perfume as he stood near me. I finally looked up at him and smiled, faintly for that was all the will I had left just then. He didn’t return the favor but kept looking at me in a quiet manner.

“Do you pity me?” I finally asked.

He shook his head and sat on the cool earth beside me.

I smiled. “Then you must feel sorry for me. Poor Aoife lived a lie all her life and didn’t even know.”

“No, Princess,” he said. “Those are none of the emotions I feel for you.”

Another time and that remark might’ve extracted a different reaction from me. But his plain tone for one thing and then my own state of mind for another were just too much to indulge in flirty sensations.

I sighed. “You’re so lucky you don’t remember anything from your past.”

“On the contrary, I remember everything I ought to have forgotten.”

“I can’t believe he would do this to me!” Suddenly I was furious. “That lullaby! That wasn’t just father-daughter bonding shit! All that time he was training me to be part of this world! All those years he was hinting I would end up in a world far away from mine! That’s why he didn’t leave me anything to hold on to in that universe. I have no ties there. No family. No house! Nothing! He knew what he was doing. He took away my choices in life! My own father did that to me!” Hot angry tears rolled down my face as new realization set my heart on fire. “He took away my choices!”

“Hey,” Demon spoke softly but his grip on my shoulders was firm. “Look at me.” He forced my gaze to rest on him. His face was serious, as were his cool eyes. “I didn’t know Alistair or what he did. I just know you’re meant to be here. And if it’s his fault then it’s a good one.”

I heard Demon but I had too many questions of my own to listen to him. “Why would he leave? If he wanted me to come back, why’d he leave the Realm?”

“We all get our share of making tough choices.” Demon replied patiently. “Don’t doubt his love, Aoife.”

The gravity of Demon’s voice made me stop and take note of what was happening, of what I was saying and thinking and feeling. I was mad at Daddy because I felt lied to but in truth he simply had never told me anything – no lies, no truth. Of course, he must’ve wanted me to come back and regain what was rightfully mine. Enth was his home that he had left for some reason and for an equally sensible reason, could never tell me about it. Perhaps, if he had lived longer –

I wiped off my tears. “I don’t hate Daddy.” I said. “I just miss him too much.” “I know,” he said and rested his back against the tree trunk.

His warm presence in the cold night was very comforting. He didn’t seem to be in a hurry to rush off to somewhere or rush me off to some place. He wasn’t looking at me or holding me anymore but the quiet pensiveness of his eyes as he toyed with his – Nivis’s – dagger charmed me just the same. And I realized something.

Demon was being nice to me.