The gadabout letters
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| im thinking of going to Naropa's international writers festival in Prague in may. two weeks with workshops, and readings and meditation time in that city would open some new doors. by may, id have the infamous list completed...that actually, now that i mention it to myself and you, may be perfect timing...hmmm. interesting.
i think we should hang out sometime soon if at all possible. i was going to drive back to chicago tuesday. about 200 miles into it, i realized i was risking my life on those highways in all the storms. instead, im having the paintings i was coming to recon shipped to my cabin. need a little vacation? come to my opening. i think i sent you an invite card. (do i even have your address for such and act?...oh yes, i do.) its Nov 29th in whitefish, montana. we'll have wine and talk about the insignificance and mirror-like characteristics of shelf-life nicknacks filling up the halls of shallow people in a relatively shallow world. hopefully sometime soon, LT JO: i think there is some lame tech stuff going on with the local phone co. here. i cannot send any email right now. i can receive it, though. so, this will probably be slightly delayed in response. but i would just tell dan straight up. tell him right after you say it sucks that he's going to miss the game because he is going to go back and see that chick AGAIN...as he does all the time anyway. tell him he needs to find a cooler girl that doesnt smoke cigs, because she'll probably always do that if she's still doing it now.
if she's cool and he really likes her, then the girl he's with shouldnt make him act differently or take him away from other things in his life that were there long before she was. tell him i said that. east coast rappazz! LD:
hi. thanks for the cds and the nice letter. i received them while visiting in chicago. i also wanted to tell you the book, 'into tibet', is really good. i am without as much time to read these days, but i've almost finished it (mostly in the bathtub, of course). i just wrote sam to see if he wants to come with to Prague in may. two weeks for naropa prameni international poetry festival. by then, the next three books will be complete and out to publishers so it should work out well. after that, if things go right, ill be moving to start the digital media studies program at the university of Portland. i havent been officially accepted yet, so its not definite, i guess. i was over at elmers yesterday for a few hours talking with them and he wrote one of my letters of recommendation. we had hot cider and cookies on napkins and laughed about laurie dillard getting fired. i thought you might like to see some photos from the wedding... KF:
hello to you... i wish we could meet up in chicago, but i dont think ill make it then. i do want to go home for christmas, though, so ill have to see what works out. i started driving back there to get some paintings i have in storage there for the upcoming show, but i got about 200 miles into the drive and, contemplating the next huge storm sweeping across the land right at me, i decided it wasnt worth it. so i had the paintings shipped out instead which actually ended up saving me about 200 dollars, and one full week. rad...moms rule. last night i slept 12 hours. i feel spacey now and slightly ethereal, except for the highly refined and heavenly part. i dont think, well, no i should say it this way: there is no chance that things are going to continue much longer with Silvia Midtown, so this has me slightly bummed. its fairly involved, but the bottom line pretty much comes out to this: its just not in the cards for me to raise someone else's child. the rest of the issues i could deal with (and believe me, there are many of them). or maybe even if there were just one big issue, or a couple small ones. but its more than that. and, in addition, she's had a pretty good record of getting overwhelmingly frustrated with things and then taking it out on me. so, sorry, that just isnt going to work. so i have this show in december and i dig the time and space i have to paint and write, and i love the montana woods where i am, but other than that, i am starting to get that all-too-familiar feeling back again and that is this: "what am i doing here? why am i here? i should probably just move on." Silvia Midtown and i have already talked about this and although she understands the reality of the situation, still is hoping it will work out someway and we will eventually live happily ever after. so she's encouraging me to take these job possibilities around here, etc. even though i told her its just not realistic. im in the process of putting together an application for the university of Portland for fall 2003. its an MA program in digital media studies which incorporates computer science, multimedia design, psychology & theory, and fine art/creative writing. i hope i get in, but if not i think it will be time to go to the far east and study there a while, write another book of poems, so i am lining up a study abroad program with naropa to sikkim, india for the same time as a backup if i dont get into Portland. i will eventually i think do both, because Portland also has a PhD program titled 'rhetoric and communication ethics' that covers the philosophies and so on of intercultural communications (perhaps some comparisons between intercultural digital disciplines and the altruistic mind)...something like that. plus, i suppose Portland would be a cool city to live in. not far from the rockies, and centrally located as well. thats four more years of school. but i figured after that id get hooked up with a state or private university or art institute somewhere and just keep painting and writing on the side..like rousseau. i am also going to put some cash together (maybe sell some ptgs in the show) and get a plane ticket and food money to go to the Naropa University - Prameni International Poetics Festival in Prague in May with my buddy samuel compton from tennessee. i might have mentioned him before, he was on tour last summer with us, writes poetry down in knoxsville, etc... he's one of the few people i could rattle of as a list of 'those to trust on earth (as opposed to those you have a feeling you shouldnt trust for some reason based on past experiences or inherant intuitions'). (kara fletcher, of course, would go on this list of people i trust.) it would be two weeks in prague, maybe go somewhere else for a few days or weeks too. other than that, ill be here painting and editing the next book, if you want to stop by and have some hot cider. g BS:
hola ben, good to hear from you! its been a while. im happy to hear things are going well for you. ive just been real busy with the upcoming show and i have also been working on some things for another show in Great Falls. Montana is always a crazy place, and is currently living up to its reputation. maybe its just me?!.. i hope you are getting to play a lot of music. one of these days i'd like to get down there and jam a bit on the aishiko with you. let me know if i can get a peak at your new roomies paintings on the web or some such shit. alrighty, soldier. hope to see you chaps soon-- LT
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rhythm mountain studios www.radio-qmx.org "Good people, you know how to create poems in the minds of saints and maybe you've never even picked up a pen." OUTLAW: american poems on the run by Leonard Treadway Available spring 2003. http://ninearts.org VG: Veeeeee.
whats the story down there? hows things? i got a call from Karen Hillary the other day but didnt talk to her. you guys talk much? she left a portland number but i think i erased it. i also have gotten a few emails from ben jammin, this rockstar kid i know in SLC. i'd like to come down and visit my long lost friend valecia sometime in her big city UTAH life. perhaps we should work something out? hmmmmm? im thinking ill be attending a visiting day at the university of Portland in january. ahh, the seventeenth to be exact--ly closer to the specific day. think you'll be around after that? this email is full of questions. i wonder why that is. R.O.W.Y.C.O.-- LT
*** Leonard Treadway rhythm mountain studios www.radio-qmx.org "Good people, you know how to create poems in the minds of saints and maybe you've never even picked up a pen." OUTLAW: american poems on the run by Leonard Treadway
http://ninearts.org VG: ok, Veeee... actually, i'd like to get out of this blasted town a helluvalot sooner than jan 17, but i have some things to do for at least the next week. then theres this show opening on the 29th, and thanksgiving im now maybe supposed to have with "this girls" family and i dont think that is such a good idea. i should probably not be around for that. i dont know. so, ben jammin tells me he's "a completely different person" and i'd really like him. what's up with that? <--going for some coffee--> vee, do you have any intelligent, sweet young hipster friends, with no kids or behavioral problems, or jesus addictions with whom i could fancy some folk clubs and write poetry to in the night? the chicks in this remote corner of montana just caint fair. ps went to a potluck affair the other evening and got a glimpse of andy gib in shiney white poly, styling both front and back covers of the vinyl jacket. oh, that sweet rock and roll.
i was wondering if you would write back. yes, the wedding was a great time. it was great to be in the city and have everyone stay at the fancy downtown hotel. i got to see my cousins who i dont see often. sold a painting on my dad's side for katy's "beach house in north carolina".
with Silvia Midtown, there is a lot to it, but basically, its not a very realistic situation for my sanity. well, actually it is a realistic situation right now...its just that it wont be as time goes on over the next couple months. plus, the whole thing with nilla just doesnt feel right to me. i've told her this. odd that i am telling you this? somewhat, i imagine. whats up with your dude? take care,
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rhythm mountain studios www.radio-qmx.org "If we live alone, it means living like madmen or criminals, in appearance at any rate, and a little bit in reality as well." OUTLAW: american poems on the run by Leonard Treadway
http://ninearts.org SS: hola chica-- que pasa? hows tricks? you never told me the story of why you moved back to UT? too many pansies and hippies in VT? (hum, check that out, your two states have very similar initials...and if they were written in ancient rome, they'd be exactly the same.) mi hermano just got married a couple weeks ago in chicago. the wedding was rad. it was great to be in the city and have everyone stay at the fancy downtown hotel. i got to see my cousins who i dont see often. sold a painting for katy's "beach house in north carolina". this week im working on this SICK still life called "outlaw poet" for the cm russell auction in great falls. the other one i am submitting is a figurative of a long sleepy cowboy in the field reading a book. the painting is called "literary outlaw". they are this cool pair of paintings. are you working? maybe you realized AOL was your true calling? hehe.
write back-- LT LD: that is the second day in a row that i downloaded all my emails, read them, replied to them, and then just checked the "send and receive" button once more before signing off and there was a letter from you. crazy. you must check your email about 1130 am mtn time on work days. anyway, the falcon painting i did as a favor to ken. it was for the raptors of the rockies auction in msla a couple months ago (raised money for a wild bird habitat in the bitterroot). i wasnt very confident about the crazy bird painting at first but then it started to look like "a Leonard otoole with ed sandoval influence" (which is good, in my opinion), plus, since i was donating it, i did it on a crappy store-bought (crappy to me, not crappy according to others) canvas. you should have seen the lady that got highest bid! she came up to me really early in the evening and just kept saying how much she loved the painting, on and on...then i said i'd paint one for her and how much it would be (because she asked). she said she couldnt afford that. then the bidding started and she won for less than what i would have charged. but it was cool because i've never seen someone so happy to get a painting before. most people like them and say they do, but this lady was going a little crazy and crying and stuff. that was a fun night. (speaking of paintings, nikki and matts is scheduled to arrive today. i sent her an email yesterday letting her know, but haven't heard back from her.) the painting i sold to katy (my cousin) is the sailboats one. anyways, the univ of Portland program is their MA in Digital Media Studies. it encorporates computer science, multimedia developement, psychology, art/creative writing. they have grad teaching assistantships, monthly stipends, and tuition waivers. plus connections all over for jobs and other schools teaching, etc. it seems a good match..we'll see. the progam starts next august. if all goes well, that will be just soon enough after i finish here, perhaps prague in may, then go get set up in Portland. what are your plans? you never answered me about your boyfriend/roommate thing. how is that going? wanna know something gross but cool? i had a wart or something on the bottom of my foot i guess i must have gotten last summer. i put compound W stuff on it for two weeks and kept scraping off the dead skin and crap. then it kept coming back, so i cut out the roots with a sterilized x-acto knife the other day cause i was sick of it. now its healing well and i think the wart might finally be gone. i bet you really wanted to know that! see ya--
g SO: hello there S.C., i was wondering how you were getting along. i figured/hope every day is probably a little smoother than the last. i wanted to tell you when we were there (but then didnt get the chance) that i sort of understand some of the feelings you were having. mom said you were feeling like you remembered how nice and easy or quiet, whatever, it was when it was just you and tony, and now that you have this whole new huge responsibility, thinking about the commitment you just made is a bit scary and worrisome... (this is probably in the past for you guys, but i wanted to tell you anyway.) when lauren and i brought home arlo we thought it was so great, we found him in the paper, went to see him and all ten of his brothers and picked them all up, played with them, etc. and you know bathing him and getting him his bowls and stuff... but then that night and for several nights after we brought him home he just howled and barked and cried ALL NIGHT LONG... REALLY REALLY LOUD!!! and we couldnt sleep and it was a mess. i started thinking very early on: "what was i thinking?"... and "im never going to have a baby!" and all this. then a little while later he started getting used to his place and his little house and hanging around our yard and it got easier and easier all the time. now, i think about those nights, or having a puppy or when i thought i didnt want a baby sometime and it seems crazy. because i know so well that it will all be fine. better than fine, it will be so much more wonderful and meaningful than i even imagined it in the beginning. and it seems silly to think at one point i thought i couldnt (or didnt want to) handle it. i wish i could be there for thanksgiving but i dont think i can make it. im going to try for christmas though. ill let you know whats going on. laurens family commissioned two paintings before we broke up. they cancelled them both, apparently. one i found out about right away, the other one, her sister didnt say anything about cancelling it. i finished it last week and sent it all the way to el paso for her to refuse the UPS delivery. what an asshole. at least now i can hang it in my show here. hopefully sell it for more. people are so lame. alrighty, anyways...talk to you later. g ***
rhythm mountain studios www.radio-qmx.org "Good people, you know how to create poems in the minds of saints and maybe you've never even picked up a pen." OUTLAW: american poems on the run by Leonard Treadway Available spring 2003. http://ninearts.org HH:
hi stranger. sorry i didnt write you back last time. i have been pretty really busy. and painting too. i think i have everything set for friday. i was told it was being featured in Entertainment NOW. that would be pretty nice. i think ill just have a few bottles of wine. maybe some of the wine in the still lifes. there is a band scheduled to play from 8 - 11 or so. that should be cool. im happy there will be other activity going on. im going to set it up wednesday afternoon. i guess it'll take me a couple trips back and forth to get all the ptgs there. now is the time i wish i had a big van. will you be around wednesday? i have a couple hundred bookmarks that were printed up for my brothers wedding as sort of gifts for the guests to take home. they asked me to write a poem they could use for it. so i did. and there are tons of extras. i thought i'd drop some off at your store and saddest pleasure to give out to cool people who come in. only cool people though. we are driving over to great falls tomorrow and coming back tuesday. i have two new ones to submit for the cm russell auction held in march. and Silvia Midtown has a doctors appt. things have been getting stressed between her and i lately because of me applying to graduated school in Portland for next fall. i dont think its very realistic to think she and nilla could move down there as well if i get in. i told her this and she's just upset and thinks im leaving for sure even though i explained EVERYTHING. i really love her a lot. i have a problem with the idea of raising someone else's child, however. plus, the close contact on and off with the ex/child's father is never black and white. tell leif hi. see you guys soon. have fun down in msla. g JO:
hiya! i dont think dad has checked his email in quite some time or something. the card and small painting i sent to 511 neeb got returned and says i have the wrong zip. hook me up with the info if you can. the "get well" card, etc is getting further and further out of date as the days roll on. plus, dad probably thinks i didnt even send grandpa a card now. --happy turkey day. (i'd call, but when lauren hooked up the phone service she neglected to get a long distance carrier. i was uninformed of this move and over the past three months, apparently, i've been getting "open billed" as the customer service assholes explained to me. the result is my current $400 phone bill that i am paying in $100-extra installments over the next four months. DAMN.) tell those keywas hello. ps Silvia Midtown says to get your grapefruit seed extract on hand for the cold season. see yous. HH: hhi there again... im happy we got to hang out for a while last night again. i honestly wish we could hang out more, but everyone's just busy all the time, i know. so, when we can, it is great. i was very tired all day yesterday, i think just exhausted from going all the time and it caught up to me right as i could slow down for a little while. but i am going to just take it easy for a couple days. i slept in till 1pm today, cleaned up the cabin, made some coffee and now just doing emails. i think Silvia Midtown and i are going to play some frisbee golf in a while then go back to hot springs (go there often). i can tell she really digs you guys, i like that a lot...last night was really fun. as for school, i have been getting the materials together for applying to the MA in digital media studies at the university of Portland. it combines computer science, multimedia design, psychology, and creative writing/fine art. i dont know why i wouldnt get accepted, its not some mickey mouse operation (as far as i can tell so far) like a lot of the MFA departments at some of the schools ive applied to in the past, but i can never be sure. (i forgot to mention last night when you were saying how some art dept's are "so eighth grade" etc: i called around last year or so at UM to get some explanations on being turned down for the grad painting there and found out that out of 500 or so "applicants" they accepted this many new incomming graduate painting students: 1. That is ridiculous. How's anybody going to learn anything?) anyway, Portland has grad teaching assistantships with tuition waiver, monthly stipend, good city, old school (1888 or something), lots of credits. seems a good match to me. plus, i was looking into a PhD they offer in intercultural Rhetoric and Communication Ethics that i think i might just head towards. by that time i will have gone off the deep end anyway and the academics will have culminated into me hermitting in some remote cabin writing a 700 page epic verse that will take years to edit and ill even do little pencil and ink drawings every five pages or so. when i told Silvia Midtown i love her but i dont know how realistic it is for us to stay together if i go to Portland next year, this is the result: she gets into these phases and everything we talk about "doesnt matter anyway because we arent going to be together much longer..." --she says that ALL THE TIME. and is constantly bringing it up. and just said today that if i keep thinking about it, maybe ill change my mind. she told me i was selfish for going away and not staying here with her. i told her its selfish for her to say that. she's just trying all these things to get me to stay here. or maybe take her with me, but i cant imagine that scenario working out in the least. she tells me all the time how much she loves me and that i am very different than anyone else she's met, but i know a big part of it is that she needs someone to get her out of her parents house. and she wants someone to take care of her...which is understandable, but a heavy, heavy load. i just say to her that i dont know whats going to happen exactly so i cant be very exact in predicting the future. sometimes its a difficult situation. but, for now, i am going to go out into this cloudy, cold day. i am going to start the pencil drawings monday for "the year i changed the royal guard" and send that manuscript out along with "outlaw: american poems on the run" to a long list of respective publishers, "the year" will go to kids book publishers, "outlaw" to indy poetry publishers. then ill take another nap.
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