T
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
HE BITS…
Tommy Chong was eliminated last night on Dancing with the Stars. Tommy says he hasn’t felt this bad since Florida voted against legalizing marijuana.
Betty White’s TV series Hot in Cleveland has been canceled. The good news is that there’ll be plenty more opportunities for a young, up and coming talent like Betty White.
Honey Boo Boo’s "Mama" June Shannon has revealed that she had her first sexual encounter at the age of 12. Mama June said it was with Chef Boy-ar-Dee.
Honey Boo Boo’s "Mama" June Shannon has revealed that she lost her virginity at the age of 12. Mama June called it the most special, memorable, significant day of her life aside from her first deep-fried Twinkie.
Former adult actress Asia Carrera had her driver's license photo taken while wearing a colander on her head as a religious statement for her Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster. At least she finally believes in safe sects.
Mo'ne Davis, the first female pitcher to win a Little League World Series game, has written her memoirs. The book will be out next March and will tell her life story from her childhood years all the way up through her childhood years.
Mo'ne Davis, the first female pitcher to win a Little League World Series game, has written her memoirs. The book will reach back into her childhood when she grew up with things like Twitter, Beyonce and the Internet.
The Hockey Hall of Fame inductions were held last night. This year’s inductees included players Rob Blake and Dominik Hasek and the inventor of dental insurance.
S
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
ON OF THE BITS…
Pope Francis will make his first papal trip to the United States with a visit to Philadelphia next September. The pope will be opening for One Direction.
Pope Francis will make his first papal trip to the United States with a visit to Philadelphia next September. However, the church has reiterated its stance against brotherly love.
Cult leader Charles Manson is getting married in prison next month. That means he’ll now be serving two life sentences.
Cult leader Charles Manson is getting married in prison next month to a 26-year-old woman who runs a Manson fan website. In other news, there’s a Charles Manson fan website.
Cult leader Charles Manson is getting married in prison next month. Up until now, his old ball and chain actually has been a ball and chain.
Cult leader Charles Manson is reportedly getting married in prison next month. Apparently Manson is quite the lady killer.
A man in a Santa Claus suit robbed a post office in Australia over the weekend. It’s got to be really embarrassing to have to put yourself on your own ‘naughty’ list.
A man in a Santa Claus suit robbed a post office in Australia over the weekend. Witnesses say he got away in a sleigh pulled by eight reindeer.
Astronomers say they’ve noticed several high-powered storms swirling across the planet Uranus. They say it means you should pack a jacket if you’re planning a trip to Uranus.
T
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
ODAY’S BITMAN AUDIO…
Today on the Bitman audio feed we have clips from The Voice, Dancing with the Stars, Monday Night Football highlights and a late night roundup with Dave, The Jimmys, Craig, Seth and Conan.
It’s all at www.BitmanComedy.com
Not hearing anything? TV Sound bites are available at BitmanComedy.com! If you need access to the site, contact Adrienne Munos at United Stations Radio Network at 561-381-7598 or amunos@unitedstations.com
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
INSELTOWN TATTLER…
Another woman has come forward to accuse BILL COSBY of sexual assault. Publicist Joan Tarshis claims that Cosby assaulted her twice in 1969 when she was 19 years old. Tarshis was an aspiring writer and two friends of hers in Los Angeles took her to have lunch with Cosby at Universal Studios, where he was shooting The Bill Cosby Show. She said Cosby never drank alcohol, but he always topped her Bloody Mary’s with beer, which he called a 'redeye.' Cosby kept inviting her back and one day asked her to stay after filming and work on some material. Tarshis says Cosby made her a redeye and the next thing she remembered was coming to on his couch while being undressed. Despite that, sometime later she agreed to out with him. She had a couple drinks, started feeling woozy and later woke up naked in his bed back at the hotel. However, Cosby may have given himself away in a 1969 comedy routine on his album It’s True! It’s True! In the routine, Cosby talks about the so-called Spanish Fly drug and slipping some in the drinks of five women at a party. (Hear here-preview)
Honey Boo Boo’s "MAMA" JUNE SHANNON told Entertainment Tonight that she had her first sexual encounter at age 12, gave birth to her first child at 14 and has been in sexual relationships with two convicted sex offenders. Her interview with Dr. Phil aired yesterday and both Phil and Uncle Poodle accused her of lying when she said photos showing her and convicted sex offender Mark McDaniel were Photoshopped. Mama June still claimed that she had no clue that McDaniel was molesting her daughter.
It turns out that actor STEPHEN COLLINS may not be in the clear of those child molestation charges as authorities in New York are looking for more recent victims. Detectives recently flew to Seattle to interview the woman whom Collins admits on tape to molesting when she was 10. While that case likely couldn’t be prosecuted due to statute of limitations, they want to find out if other, more recent victims might have come forward.
T
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
INSELTOWN TATTLER 2…
AMANDA BYNES has apologized for that audio recording in which she said she wanted to kill her parents. Amanda issued a statement to “Access Hollywood” that obviously wasn’t written by her. The statement said, “I’m sorry I trusted people who clearly were not my friends and capitalized on my illness. I am doing my best to get better. I am truly sorry for the statements I made. I am sorry for any pain I caused my family and others…I am thankful for everyone’s patience and understanding. I never expected others to take advantage and profit from my condition. I’m disappointed with those who lulled me into a false sense of security only to find out they really are only interested in selling my privacy to the media.”
NICKI MINAJ could use Life Lock! Nicki’s credit scored plunged earlier this month after her social security number was exposed on a leaked New York City police booking photo from a 2003 shoplifting arrest. A tabloid left the Social Security number for Minaj, who was born “Onika Maraj,” on the story they published earlier this month. Word is that Nicki’s credit score dropped almost 100 points soon after, because there were many inquiries into her financial records and she may have to get a new social security number.
A lot of people griped when TAYLOR SWIFT was named New York City's tourism ambassador last month. Critics questioned how much she could know about the city, since she's only lived there for a little over a year. However, Taylor has Long Island native BILLY JOEL on her side. Joel said, "I see the New York press going, 'Taylor Swift is going to be the new New York representative?' You snoots. Let her in. That's what New York is all about. I say, 'Welcome.'" Joel also praised her songwriting talents, saying "She catches a lot of junk, maybe because she's so popular with young girls. But I like what she's projecting. I respect what she's doing."
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
INSELTOWN TATTLER 3…
TILA TEQUILA gave birth to a baby girl on Sunday. She named her daughter Isabella Monroe Nguyen. Tila had kept fans updated on her pregnancy via her website, sharing photos of her baby bump and blogging about how she was feeling.
ELLEN DEGENERES & PORTIA DE ROSSI have unveiled their holiday cards. In a parody of Kim Kardashian’s Paper magazine cover, the women have their heads Photoshopped on Kim’s bare backside photo with strategically placed red bows. The card reads "Happy Holidays and a Shiny New Year." (See here)
ESPN sports reporter MICHELLE BEADLE continues to bash KIM KARDASHIAN over her magazine cover. When a reporter caught up with Michelle at LAX she said, “She doesn't have anything else to show off ... so I get why she's doing it…What else is she gonna do? She's got no talent…And Photoshop’s wonderful." (See here)
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
ATELINE HOLLYWOOD…
New Movies on DVD:
22 Jump Street - Jonah Hill and Channing Tatum are back on the case.
And So It Goes - Michael Douglas and Diane Keaton raise his 9-year-old granddaughter.
Frozen - Chill with Kristen Bell and Idina Menzel.
If I Stay - The life of Chloë Grace Moretz hangs in the balance after a car accident.
Into the Storm - Killer tornadoes strike a small town.
Sin City: A Dame to Kill For - Jessica Alba and Joseph Gordon-Levitt star in the sequel.
New TV on DVD:
Breaking Amish: Season 2 Brave New World
Last Man Standing: The Complete Third Season
TV Land has canceled HOT IN CLEVELAND after six seasons. The show starred Betty White, Valerie Bertinelli and Jane Leeves and its final season is currently in production.
Tommy Chong’s run on DANCING WITH THE STARS went up in smoke last night as he and partner Peta Murgatroyd were eliminated. Janel Parrish, Bethany Mota, Alfonso Ribeiro and Sadie Robertson will compete for the Mirror Ball trophy to be awarded next week.
Fox has renewed "SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE" for a 12th season. However, this season, dancers who advance from auditions will be divided into two teams of stage dancers who are trained in styles like jazz, tap or ballet and street dancers who’ve mastered hip-hop and break dancing.
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
USIC NOTES…
New Music in Stores Today…
Sara Evans - “At Christmas [MP3]“
Bryan Ferry - “Avonmore”
Nickelback - “No Fixed Address”
One Direction - “Four”
P.O.D. - “SoCalSessions” (12-song acoustic album)
Rich Robinson (former Black Crowes guitarist) - “Woodstock Sessions Vol. 3"
TV on the Radio - “Seeds”
Various artists - “The Art of McCartney” (covers of McCartney songs by Bob Dylan, Billy Joel, etc.)
Various artists - “Christmas at Downton Abbey” (45-track double CD by the cast)
Reissues (CD / vinyl)
David Bowie - “Nothing Has Changed.” (career-spanning collection)
Depeche Mode - “Depeche Mode Live in Berlin [CD + DVD + Blu-ray]“ (filmed at the O2 World Berlin on Nov. 25 and 27, 2013)
Foghat - “Drivin’ Wheels: Best of 1972-1982"
The Manhattans - “There’s No Good in Goodbye (Expanded Edition)”
The Manhattans - “After Midnight” (remastered, with bonus tracks)
Johnny Mathis - “The Complete Global Albums Collection [Box set]“ (13 discs)
Bruce Springsteen - “The Album Collection, Vol. 1 1973-1984 [Box set]“
Wilco - “Alpha Mike Foxtrot: Rare Tracks 1994-2014 [Box set]“ (four CDs of rare studio and live recordings)
Trisha Yearwood - “Prize Fighter: Hit After Hit” (10 hits with six new songs)
DVD / Blu-ray
Billy Joel - “The Last Play at Shea: The Documentary Film [Blu-ray + DVD]“
The Rolling Stones - “From The Vault: L.A. Forum – Live In 1975 [DVD]“
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
USIC NOTES 2…
The new BRUCE SPRINGSTEEN store Live.Springsteen.net launched yesterday just in time for all of your Boss holiday shopping. Among the live recordings available on the site is a previously unreleased concert at New York's Apollo Theater on March 9th, 2012. There are also recordings of 30 shows from the 2014 High Hopes tour, and Springsteen's entire album catalog.
Starbucks has responded to NEIL YOUNG’S boycott over their involvement with a lawsuit against the state of Vermont's new requirements to label genetically modified ingredients. While Starbucks says they’re not part of the suit, Young is apparently standing by his boycott for now as he says other states plan to follow Vermont’s lead and it’s important to stand strong against the lawsuit.
Did ADELE snub the 30th anniversary remake of “Do They Know It’s Christmas?” Project organizer BOB GELDOF said Adele ignored his pleas to appear on the song. However, her people say she chose to support the cause “with a donation.”
ONE DIRECTION performed on the Today Show yesterday morning without Zayn Malik, who also missed the videos the band made to accept their recent awards from the MTV EMAs. Liam Payne said Malik was having stomach issues, but host Matt Lauer asked, "Is it something more serious than just a minor illness?" Lauer also mentioned "rumors of substance abuse." (See here)
ARIANA GRANDE, TAYLOR SWIFT, ED SHEERAN and HOZIER have been announced as performers at the 2014 Victoria's Secret Fashion Show being held next month in London. The show will air December 9th on CBS.
The final show of LADY GAGA’S Artpop tour will be streamed on Yahoo Live next Monday. The show will stream live from Paris, with opening sets by Lady Starlight and Breedlove, starting at 1:45 p.m. Eastern.
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
USIC NOTES 3…
The reviews may have been awful, but Lifetime’s AALIYAH biopic did pretty well in the ratings as some 3.2 million viewers tuned in to see it. That makes it the No. 2 cable movie of 2014, behind Lifetime’s Flowers in the Attic. The film also topped Nielsen Media's Twitter ratings for the week with 997,000 tweets.
RASCAL FLATTS has announced plans for a Las Vegas residency at the Hard Rock Hotel and Casino. Rascal Flatts Vegas Riot will play nine dates starting next February 25th.
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
UBULAR…
Daytime:
GMA: Kiera Knightley; Trisha Yearwood performs
CBS This Morning: Musician Jimmy Page
Today: ``The Voice'' judges Adam Levine, Blake Shelton, Pharrell Williams and Gwen Stefani
Kelly & Michael: Keira Knightley NASCAR champion Kevin Harvick
The View: ``Dancing With the Stars'' castoffs
The Talk: Soleil Moon Frye prepares a family meal
Ellen: Julianne Moore
Primetime:
Fox: Master Chef Junior Edition has Gordon Ramsay’s mom guest judging; former Cosby kid Lisa Bonet guest stars on New Girl
NBC: The Voice sends two performers home; Ella Henderson performs
ESPN: College hoops State Farm Champions Classic: Duke vs. Michigan State; Kansas vs. Kentucky
ESPN2: College hoops Marquette at Ohio State; Texas Tech at LSU
NBC Sports: NHL Sharks at Sabres
Late Night:
Jimmy Kimmel: People's Sexiest Man Alive cover reveal; Jason Bateman; Courtney Love
David Letterman: Stupid pet tricks; Hiss Golden Messenger performs
Jimmy Fallon: Russell Brand; Brooke Shields
Craig Ferguson: Jane Lynch; Metallica performs
Seth Meyers: Shaquille O'Neal
Conan: Hilary Swank; Hoodie Allen performs
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Friday,
May 29th, 2009
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
HE WATERCOOLER…
If you’re plotting your holiday shopping strategy, it may seem hard to believe but not all stores will be open on Thanksgiving Day. Those not opening on Turkey Day include T.J. Maxx, Marshalls, Costco, Home Depot, Ace Hardware, Barnes & Noble, Patagonia, Dillard's, Crate and Barrel, Neiman Marcus, GameStop, Nordstrom, Bed Bath & Beyond, Burlington Coat Factory and REI.
Cult leader Charles Manson is getting married. The 80-year-old Manson got a marriage license earlier this month and is marrying 26-year-old Afton Elaine Burton, who runs a Manson fan website. The ceremony will take place next month behind bars, although there will be no conjugal visits.
Australian news anchor Karl Stefanovic wore the same suit on the air for a year. It wasn’t due to lack of a wardrobe budget, but to make a point about sexism. Karl said he’s judged on his job skills whereas women, such as his co-host Lisa Wilkinson, receive criticism on a daily basis for her clothes, her hair and her overall appearance. Lisa was all for Karl’s little experiment, although he went an entire month before he even told her – and she’d never noticed he was wearing the same suit and neither did viewers! (See here)
Matt Haag makes almost $1 million a year…playing the video game Call of Duty. The 22-year-old Haag is better known by the handle, Nadeshot. He’s sponsored by Red Bull and he and his team have a dietician keeping them in shape and they do yoga to care for their wrists. Not surprisingly, Haag’s father calls him something of a "loner." While video game competitions bring him some money, the key to his success is his online presence. Not only do fans watch him play games online; he also posts YouTube video journals and fans can even buy Nadeshot merchandise. Haag told the Chicago Tribune, "What is it about me that people gravitate toward? I wish I knew. I don't consider myself to be over-the-top entertaining or someone that would be a joy to be around 24-7, but it's working for me."
T
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Friday,
May 29th, 2009
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
HE WATERCOOLER 2…
There’s an old scam that’s making a comeback. It involves someone offering an expensive purebred puppy for sale cheap under the guise of the owner being in the military and getting transferred or the family simply can't afford it any longer. Sometimes the only cost to you is shipping. However, if you bite on that, they may also hit you up for such things as veterinary bills, an inspection fee or crating. Of course, in the end, there never was any dog and you end up with nothing. If you feel compelled to go forward, do an image search of the dog’s photo to see if it shows up in other ads. On the other hand, you can avoid the risk and adopt from a local animal shelter.
Now here’s something you don’t see everyday…Fort Meyers, Florida’s Heather Penticoff became a mother and a grandmother on the same day last week. About three hours after 40-year-old Heather gave birth to a girl named Madeline, her daughter, 20-year-old Destinee Martin, gave birth to her son Damien. They both found out they were pregnant nine months ago and Destinee said she wasn't happy when she first learned about her mother's pregnancy on the same day as her own, but said the two have bonded through the experience. While the two never expected to have the same due dates, doctors induced both pregnancies last Tuesday for separate medical reasons.
According to a new study published in Microbiome, when people kiss intimately for 10 seconds they transfer up to 80 million bacteria between them. Dutch researchers defined those kisses as having both full tongue contact and saliva exchange. The good news is that this is actually healthy as the more bacteria we're exposed to, the stronger our resistance can potentially become. The odd thing they found was that most of the couples reported very different kissing tallies, with 74% of men reporting more kisses than their female partners did, at an average of 10 French kisses a day, compared to women's five. In one case, a man reported an average of 50 intimate kisses a day, to his partner's eight.
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
PORTS SHIRT…
The Miami Marlins have signed All-Star outfielder Giancarlo Stanton to the largest contract in North American team sports history. The Marlins and Stanton agreed to a 13-year, $325 million deal. Stanton was eligible for free agency in two years.
The Atlanta Braves traded outfielder Jason Heyward and pitcher Jordan Walden to the St. Louis Cardinals for pitchers Shelby Miller and Tyrell Jenkins.
The Toronto Blue Jays have reportedly signed catcher Russell Martin to a five-year, $82 million contact. Martin had received a qualifying offer from the Pittsburgh Pirates and the Chicago Cubs had also been interested.
Free agent Pablo Sandoval arrived in Boston yesterday for a meeting with Red Sox officials. The Red Sox are expected to make Sandoval a big offer to lure him away from the San Francisco Giants.
The Phoenix Suns have suspended forward P.J. Tucker for violating team rules. Tucker was listed as inactive for last night’s victory over the Boston Celtics. A Suns spokeswoman said Tucker “basically missed the plane” to Boston on Sunday. Earlier this season, the NBA suspended Tucker for three games following his guilty plea to “super extreme” driving while intoxicated in Arizona.
The Hockey Hall of Fame inducted its Class of 2014 last night. This year’s inductees included players Rob Blake, Peter Forsberg, Dominik Hasek and Mike Modano, along with coach Pat Burns and referee Bill McCreary.
Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
Scoreboard
NFL:
Pittsburgh 27 Tennessee 24 Final
NBA:
Dallas 107 Charlotte 80 Final
Denver 106 Cleveland 97 Final
Phoenix 118 Boston 114 Final
Miami 95 Brooklyn 83 Final
Orlando 107 Detroit 93 Final
Memphis 119 Houston 93 Final
San Antonio 100 Philadelphia 75 Final
Portland 102 New Orleans 93 Final
Chicago 105 L.A. Clippers 89 Final
NHL:
Tampa Bay 5 N.Y. Rangers 1 Final
Today’s Games
NBA:
L.A. Lakers at Atlanta (7:30 PM)
New York at Milwaukee (8:00 PM)
Oklahoma City at Utah (9:00 PM)
New Orleans at Sacramento (10:00 PM)
NHL:
St. Louis at Boston (7:00 PM)
Tampa Bay at N.Y. Islanders (7:00 PM)
Detroit at Columbus (7:00 PM
San Jose at Buffalo (7:30 PM)
Nashville at Toronto (7:30 PM)
Pittsburgh at Montreal (7:30 PM)
New Jersey at Winnipeg (8:00 PM)
Carolina at Dallas (8:30 PM)
Anaheim at Calgary (9:00 PM)
Washington at Arizona (9:00 PM)
Florida at Los Angeles (10:30 PM)
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
UH…
There’s nothing like taking a nap after a big meal. One Georgia couple did just that. Unfortunately, they were dining at a Golden Corral restaurant at the time. Police arrived to find an unnamed man asleep face down in a plate of food with Angela Denice Reece sleeping next to him. An officer saved the man’s life by waking him up so he didn’t inhale food and choke, while Angela was awoken and arrested for possession of a controlled substance.
Gainesville, Georgia’s Keith Sylvester Evans, girlfriend Johnna Lee Rayman and their 7-month-old baby liked to do things together as a family. Unfortunately, those things included burglarizing homes. Alas, the crime spree came to an end and during questioning they revealed that they’d brought their unsuspecting baby along with them during the capers. In addition to burglary charges, the couple also faces charges of child cruelty and, yes, possession of methamphetamine.
Phoenix paramedic Jason Alexander helped transport an elderly man to a local hospital. Sadly, the man didn’t pull through, nor did his 1969 Rolex Submariner watch valued at $10,000. When the man’s son found he’d inherited the watch and couldn’t find it, he was told the watch was removed from his father’s wrist by a paramedic while he was in the ambulance. The son later found the watch for sale on eBay and police discovered the eBay seller was Alexander, who told them "I made a mistake," adding that he was living with his parents and owed them money. Alexander is going to have an even tougher time paying his parents as he had to raise bail money and is on unpaid leave from the company.
An unnamed hunter in upstate New York killed a deer and placed it on a cart to haul it away. Unfortunately, when another hunter saw the deer moving, he thought it was alive, fired his rifle and struck the first hunter in the hand and buttocks. The injured hunter was taken to a local hospital with non-life threatening injuries. The deer was presumably still dead.
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
O’ DUH…
San Tan Valley, Arizona’s 22-year-old Justin Sarten sent text messages to his girlfriend saying he’d been kidnapped while in Tempe on Thursday night. Justin then alerted law enforcement that he was in a vehicle heading south on the 202 freeway. Justin managed to follow up with additional text messages to deputies reporting his location. The good news for Justin is that deputies found him with three men. The bad news for Justin is that the three men informed deputies Justin had voluntarily gone with them and he was arrested for making a false report.
New Mexico’s 34-year-old Shylen Salazar was arrested for allegedly stealing a truck. However, after being placed in a holding cell, she started hyperventilating and told officers she’d swallowed drugs. A pipe was found in her bra and Shylen was rushed to a hospital. However, while no one was looking, Shylen managed to climb up though the hospital’s ceiling tiles and evade officers for an hour. In addition to the stolen vehicle thing, Shylen also faces drug and escape charges.
Bernalillo, New Mexico middle school math teacher Benjamin Nagurski gave his students a pop quiz. At some point during the quiz Mr. Nagurski requested that a student stop talking to another pupil. By ‘request,’ we mean that Mr. Nagurski allegedly pulled a knife on the kid and told him, "Maybe next time I'll pull a machete on you." Police arrived and other students corroborated the story and now Mr. Nagurski faces charges of aggravated assault with a deadly weapon and possession of an unlawful weapon.
Australia’s E-view real estate agency uses a drone to capture breathtaking aerial views of homes they’re selling. Agent Steve Walsh took photos of one such home. However, in addition to the home, the drone captured a photo of 50-year-old grandmother Mandy Lingard sunbathing topless in a G-string in her own backyard. Luckily, Mandy happened to be lying face down at the time, but she’s still upset that her image was then plastered across a billboard, in a real estate magazine and online. Mandy says her son has noticed it and he's embarrassed his mom is there.
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Bitman
By David Evjen
Bitman1@aol.com
Tuesday,
November 18th, 2014
ISTORY LESSON…
1865: Samuel L. Clemens published his story "The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County" under the pen name Mark Twain
1883: The United States and Canada adopted a system of standard time zones
1902: The teddy bear was invented by Morris Michton, who named it after Teddy Roosevelt
1919: Ticker tape was first used in a parade to welcome the Prince of Wales to New York City
1963: The first touch tone phones went into service in Pennsylvania
1966: U.S. Roman Catholic bishops did away with the rule against eating meat on Fridays.
1978: 912 people died at the People's Temple mass suicide in at the Reverend Jim Jones' compound in Guyana.
1985: Redskins quarterback Joe Theismann broke his leg on Monday Night Football, ending his playing career
1995: The Rolling Stones became the first act to broadcast a concert on the Internet
2003: The Massachusetts Supreme Court ruled that the state's prohibition against same-sex marriages was unconstitutional.
2004: Bill Clinton's presidential library opened in Little Rock
2006: Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes were married in Italy
Birthday Partiers:
actress Linda Evans (Dynasty, The Big Valley, Beach Blanket Bingo) 72
actor/comedian Kevin Nealon (Weeds, SNL, Anger Management) 61
actress Katey Sagal (8 Simple Rules, Married With Children, Sons of Anarchy) 58
actor Owen Wilson (Meet The Fockers, Wedding Crashers, Marley & Me) 46
actress Chloë Sevigny (Big Love, Zodiac, Dogville) 40
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